Curry and mashed potatoes

James and I finished dinner while Imogen was at soccer practice--dinner for two.  I made cauliflower curry but James is not allowed to eat rice on his restricted diet--the replacement was yukon gold mashed potatoes. It was an odd marriage on the plate. After dessert of chocolate pudding for James and ice-cream for me, I told him, "I have not written the blog for a bit."  James said, "Well, you should probably do that--people are reading."  I left James to watch a documentary about butterflies on PBS.

Imogen had her graduation ceremony today from her elementary school. It was a goal for James to attend and walk to the near-by middle school auditorium in which the event took place since PS34 does not have a space large enough to accommodate all the families and friends that would want to attend. James and I were nervous about this re-entry into the community and if he would have the endurance to make it through the ceremony. 

The children were breathtakingly beautiful. Lovely faces made me take in a deep breath to keep from crying.

James received an award in recognition for his contribution to the school over the years.  The principal, Carmen Asselta, had spoken to me previously, weeks ago, about presenting this appreciation to James for his contribution to the school, as they were planning the ceremony but at the time, it seemed remote and I did not believe that James would be able to attend. It was suddenly upon us. James and I had not even talked about this recognition of his efforts that would take place as part of the program since we were focused on the morning being a celebration of Imogen's achievements and those of her fellow students.  We have known so many of those faces since kindergarten--even those children that were not in Imogen's class were a part of our lives through school events and seeing them on the playground and in the neighborhood. 

When our friend Karla walked to the stage to receive her award as an active supporter of the school, James turned to me and said, "Oh, what should I do?"  I shrugged my shoulders--I had no idea. It seemed perfectly natural for James to stand and walk toward the stage.  Carmen, together with Imogen's teachers, vice-principal and the school district's superintendent quickly came down off the stage to meet with James and give him his certificate and a bouquet of flowers.  I saw someone wave to the students to stand.  I was keeping my attention on James but sensed the applause.  I was supporting James with an arm around his waist and looked into the tear brimmed eyes of one of Imogen's teachers, Andrea Kubis. What warmth I felt from everyone in that moment. Thank you PS34 teachers, administrators, and families for loving James.

We walked out of the auditorium into the bright sunshine.  James was slightly overwhelmed and we had the walk home ahead of us but he appeared strong and content.  He walked up the stairs, had a glass of thickened water, and took a nap on the bed.

We had a visit this evening with an occupational therapist James met through the hospital who is truly fantastic--Jack.  I was feeling a little lost in the wilderness with James. I thought that he had fallen far behind in his recovery but Jack assessed James who appears to be doing fine--better than he had expected. It has been hard for me to judge and it was such a relief to hear that James has made improvements in some areas such as his balance.

Jack walked through the apartment with us to help set practical goals for James and imagine areas that may prove challenging on both a physical and cognitive level.  I was feeling as if I was adrift in the ocean on a small raft with the vastness of the water engulfing me. There was no horizon line, only infinite space in all directions. Jack brought everything back to me--the islands that were there all along that I could not recognize.  Jack and James have a rapport with one another--it is wonderful to witness. 

Jack saw James on his first day at rehab--when he could not sit up unassisted and his head flopped down as if he was a raggedy andy doll. Jack is able to be objective as a professional.  He has a perfect combination of this practical acumen and warmth with a dash of humor that is essential to encourage James.  Jack has the means to tease out James's cognitive deficits which makes it far less mysterious than it has been for me to navigate.  Jack is grounding and I am grateful for him in our lives.

I still have so much to do with James but at the very least, I have this additional person working with me that will be able to come in and point out the best way for us to move forward. 

James needs people in his life--he's such a social animal. People like Jack have the capability to give him the stimulus his needs, to challenge him, but not deplete him. It is a fine balance.  As James grows stronger, I am hoping that his friends will sustain him in a similar way. 

Robert arrives next week--it will be interesting to see them interact together. James does not recall Robert's earlier visit while he was in intensive care. Robert remembers.  It will be glorious to see them together. I am excited.

July feels slightly less intimidating now that I know Jack will be an island. I am hoping to discover other isle oases.